Love and Loss

9th October, 2023

There are certain days when you feel that you've reached the lowest point in your life. Today is one such for me. From a delayed PPO announcement in my professional life to the growing misunderstandings in my personal life, everything seems to be very much out of my hands. Trying to find an escape scribbling down my thoughts here.

In the tapestry of my life, there are three threads of love, each woven with deep affection and care, each uniquely complex and etched into the fabric of my being. Today, as the calendar marks a significant day, I find myself caught in a whirlpool of emotions, yearning for understanding and closure.

The first thread, the tender ember of my very first love, lights up within me. Today is her birthday, and the waves of nostalgia carry me back to innocent times, when her laughter painted my world with colors I had never known. I send her heartfelt wishes, hoping she's found all the happiness she deserves.

The second thread is an unyielding love that once held me captive. Its flame, though subdued, still flickers within me, casting a gentle glow on memories we once shared. Time may have passed, leaving its marks and scars, but my affection remains as steadfast as the northern star. Amidst the complexities, controversies, and misunderstood moments that fate intertwined within our story, my heart seeks clarity and understanding. The path I journeyed was beset with public backlashes, accusations that I knew to be untrue. I hope, in the depths of my being, that misunderstandings find their resolve and that transparency prevails. I cherish the memories we made, the love we once celebrated, and in the quiet corners of my thoughts, I send silent wishes for her to find a journey blessed with genuine joy and profound love.

Then, there's the third thread, a tale of recent sorrow and misunderstanding. In my attempt to revive the warmth we once had, I found myself lost in a labyrinth of emotions. I sought solace and understanding, but the silence echoed louder than words. All I ever wanted was to be heard, to bridge the gap that had grown between us. I hold onto hope, believing that empathy and sensibility will find a way to mend what's broken, for my care for her remains untouched, deep-rooted.

In this quiet monologue of love and loss, I bear no grudges, just an earnest wish that circumstances could be different. I remain open to the possibility of healing and reconciliation. I extend my thoughts and emotions to the universe, in the hopes that they may find their way to the hearts of these three remarkable women who have shaped my journey so far.